Date: February 6, 2020
Elon Musk: It was recently discovered that Pluto is not actually a dog.
Doctor, how do I stop my nose from running?! Stick your foot out and trip it up!
Wine doesn't have many vitamins. That's why you have to drink a lot of it.
I can always count on the local cemetery for free Mother's Day flowers.
Happy new year!! Brrrrrr it's cold outside... It has to be the coldest day of the year
You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead