Date: March 28, 2020
How come Macaulay Culkin never get sick? Because he stays home alone.
My girlfriend said we should experiment more in the bedroom. This morning we synthesized a new protein chain.
My friends think I have a drinking problem. So I told them: no, I actually think I drink quite well
Coronavirus has been in the US for 1 day and people are already wearing masks. AIDS has been here for 59 years and fools still don't use a condom.
Too bad Boris Johnson never watched Home Alone. It could have been a real game-changer.
My therapist told me to write letters to the people I hate and burn them. Did that, but now I don't know what to do with the letters.