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Jokes Date: March 28, 2020

Too bad Boris Johnson never watched Home Alone. It could have been a real game-changer.

COVID-19 quarantine

A man went to see his doctor because he was suffering from a miserable COVID-19. His doctor prescribed some pills, but they didn't help. On his next visit, the doctor gave him a shot, but that didn't do any good. On his third visit, the doctor told the man, "Go home and take a hot bath. As soon as you finish bathing throw open all the windows and stand in the draft."But doc," protested the patient, "if I do that, I'll get pneumonia."I know," said the doctor, "I can cure pneumonia."

COVID-19 deaths by country

COVID-19 cases by country: Russia: Confirmed cases:0, deaths:45

COVID-19 isolation

What's the most common day to get sick on? Achoosday

Superman wears Chuck Norris underpants

Superman wears Chuck Norris underpants.

Valentine's day gift

This Valentines Day, I want to really surprise my wife. So I'm gonna introduce her to my girlfriend

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