Date: February 10, 2020
I don't need a football game to get drunk and scream at my television.
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen! This is your captain speaking. I have good news: today I am operating the plane safely from home. The bad news is that we have no approved landings due to the global pandemic and we are out of fuel.
I am very ill, you have to help me out! Certainly, get out, please?
Happy new year!! Brrrrrr it's cold outside... It has to be the coldest day of the year
Chuck Norris did that to Michael Jackson's face, coz he stole his underpants.
Two drunks come out of a bar... One says to the other: "We gotta go back, I forgot to pee." The other one replies: "No problem, dude, I can teach you how to do it!