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Jokes Date: March 26, 2020

Relieve stress in tough Coronavirus times. Stress makes you fat

I forgot to pee

Two drunks come out of a bar... One says to the other: "We gotta go back, I forgot to pee." The other one replies: "No problem, dude, I can teach you how to do it!

How I view lesbian relationships

I was asked how I view lesbian relationships. Apparently in HD wasn't the right answer.

COVID-19 quarantine

A man went to see his doctor because he was suffering from a miserable COVID-19. His doctor prescribed some pills, but they didn't help. On his next visit, the doctor gave him a shot, but that didn't do any good. On his third visit, the doctor told the man, "Go home and take a hot bath. As soon as you finish bathing throw open all the windows and stand in the draft."But doc," protested the patient, "if I do that, I'll get pneumonia."I know," said the doctor, "I can cure pneumonia."

I hate pussies

I love watching two girls meet each other. It's easily the fakest thing I have ever seen.

Why did you put a slug

Wife: Fred, why did you put a slug in my mother's bed? Fred: Because I couldn't find a snake.