Date: March 11, 2020
Don't expect a "bless you" after you sprayed me down with your sneeze.
What did the rat say to the cat? Nothing, cats don't talk you fucking idiot.
In 2020 there are the longest holidays. WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIEt after the holidays.
Doctor, I'm having trouble with my breathing.I'll give you something that will soon put a stop to that!
Mall Santa: what do you want for Christmas? Me: drugs. Mall Santa *whispers* meet me in the food court in 20 minutes.
This Valentines Day, I want to really surprise my wife. So I'm gonna introduce her to my girlfriend