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Jokes Date: April 15, 2020

Self-isolation day 10: -Where is your wife? -In the yard. -But I don't see her. -Oh, you just have to dig a little.

Coronavirus vaccine

Chuck Norris's tears cure coronavirus... Too bad he has never cried.

A fire chief died

A fire chief died and went to heaven. When he got there he saw a long line waiting to get into the pearly gates. He told himself, "I'm a fire chief, I'm not going to wait in line." He went to the angels guarding the gates and said, "Let me in. I'm a fire chief." The angels replied, "Youll have to wait in line like everyone else, sir."While waiting at the back of the line he saw a sedan pull up with red lights and a man got out wearing a white helmet that said "CHIEF". The angels popped to attention and let the chief enter heaven. The waiting fire chief was pissed and went to talk to the angels. He asked, "Why did you let that fire chief go through and not me?" To which the angels replied, "You have it all wrong, sir. That's God, he just thinks he's a Fire Chief.

Curiosity killed the cat

Curiosity killed the cat... NASA sincerely apologizes

Why did the squirrel cross the road?

Why did the squirrel cross the road? To get to the other side.

I drink quite well

My friends think I have a drinking problem. So I told them: no, I actually think I drink quite well