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Captain speaking working from home

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Jokes Date: April 4, 2020

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen! This is your captain speaking. I have good news: today I am operating the plane safely from home. The bad news is that we have no approved landings due to the global pandemic and we are out of fuel.

Chuck Norris isn't real

Chuck Norris isn't real... If he had been real, he would've come here and probably smash my head on my keyboarjfjcjcndndjxucbfjdi oejebhh jdudyehsbsj

Let's make love

A man tells his wife "Here's your aspirin, my dear." Wife: Why are you giving me an aspirin? I don't have a headache. Man: Gotcha! Let's make love!

How do cats eat spaghetti?

How do cats eat spaghetti? The same as everyone else - they put it in their mouths!

Ashamed of what I do this weekend

I can't wait to be ashamed of what I do this weekend.

Call me handsome

Three people having sex is called a threesome... Two people having sex is called a twosome. Now I know why everyone calls me handsome.

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